How to Stop Overthinking?

A few days ago, I was stuck in traffic.

(Oh, I just heard a voice in my head, “Tell me something new.”)

The honking, the crawling lane… and of course, my mind took the opportunity to wander into its favourite hobby:

Worrying.

Work deadlines.

A client proposal.

Whether I spent enough time with my son this week.

An unpaid bill.

A decision I’ve been postponing for far too long.

You know how it goes.

One thought becomes ten.

Ten become a story.

And suddenly, you’re stressed about something that hasn’t even happened.

Later that night, I picked up Life’s Amazing Secrets by Gaur Gopal Das and landed on a page that felt like a gentle slap.

A flowchart:

Simple.
Clear.
Almost annoyingly logical.

THE FLOWCHART

Do you have a problem?

• No?
  Then why worry?

• Yes?
  Can you do something about it?

  👉 Yes? Then take action, why worry?
  👉 No? Then why worry?

That’s it.

No complicated philosophies.
No mindfulness jargon.
No 2-hour meditation retreat.

Just a tiny decision tree that knocks 80% of our stress out.

You see, Worry Lives in the Halfway Zone. Most of our anxiety sits in a grey area:

We don’t act.
We don’t accept.

We hover.
We stew.
We imagine worst-case scenarios.

And the brain loves this half-cooked zone more than anything.

But this flowchart forces us to choose:

Action or Acceptance.

Both are liberating.

Worry is neither.

Last Friday, a manager told me:

“I’m constantly worried my team will mess up.”

We walked through the flowchart:

Do you have a Problem?
Yes. Performance inconsistency.

Can you do something about it?
Yes. Coach, delegate clearly, set expectations.

“Then why worry?”

He stared at the paper.

Then sighed.

Worry was easier than leadership.

And that’s the harsh truth for many of us.

What about times when the answer is “No, I Can’t Control It”

Traffic.
Weather.
Market swings.
Someone else’s opinion.
Timing of opportunities.

When the answer is “No”, we still worry because worrying makes us feel like we’re doing something.

But we’re not.

We’re just draining energy we could use to:

• rest,

• create,

• connect,

• learn,

• or simply… breathe

Acceptance isn’t defeat.

It’s efficiency.

This Isn’t Ignorance. It’s Prioritization.

Many people misunderstand this concept as:

“Just ignore problems.”

No.

This isn’t about running away.

It’s about focusing only where your effort matters.

Leaders rise by placing energy on influence, not illusion.

Where I Apply This Personally

As someone balancing:

• leadership programs,

• client interventions,

• writing,

• coaching,

• parenting,

• fitness…

my daily headspace can get crowded.

So now, here’s what I do:

I write down one thing I’m worried about.

Then I ask the two questions.

If I CAN do something:
Plan → Act (not perfect, just move)

If I CAN’T:
Let go → Move on (don’t carry what’s not mine) or figure out what I don't know yet.

The relief is instant.

The Calm of Clarity.

The more I use this, the more I notice:

Most worry is:

• habitual

• inherited

• unnecessary

We’ve been trained to worry.

We were never taught how to think about worry.

This flowchart teaches thinking.

And that’s leadership.

Try This Experiment for ONE Week

Whenever a worry pops up:

1️⃣ Ask
Do I have a real problem?
(You’ll be shocked how many don’t pass this gate.)

2️⃣ If yes, ask
Can I do something about it?
→ If yes → act immediately, even a small step.
→ If no → acknowledge and release.

Watch what happens to:

• your mood,

• your productivity,

• your sleep,

• your relationships.

Peace isn’t a miracle.

It’s a process.

Before You Scroll Away…

The world won’t stop throwing situations at you.

But you can stop throwing your peace away in return.

So next time your mind spirals, gently ask:

Do I have a problem?

Can I do something about it?

And if the answer leads to a dead end…

Then,

Why worry?